A Chat with TC Boyle

had my second real conversation with TC Boyle today. We talked for almost an hour. Some of things I learned from this transmission:

1. He's reading at the New Yorker Festival next week + he's not going to bring his laptop. In fact, he never brings his laptop with him when he's on tour or giving a reading at a festival/conference. The only thing he brings are manuscripts, books he's reading for research + lots of clean underwear. For a second I thought he was telling me he's incontinent, but then I realized he just brings the important stuff. So let me repeat: manuscripts, books + underwear. Now that's a real author

2. He doesn't watch TV. Like me, he'll watch a movie on the Movie Classics Channel, an action flick at the theater or a DVD (because movies have a beginning + an end) but he pretty much avoids TV at all costs

3. He hates his cell phone. He never answers it.
--Let them call my agent, he said.
In fact, he told me he only brings his cell phone for emergencies

4. It's impossible to say something original to him. I mean, I've tried + it's just impossible. There's nothing this guy hasn't already heard, thought of or written + that really fucks with your mind after awhile. I find myself wanting to use more and more hip-hop slang because that's one of the only areas where I'm gonna represent.

--Yo TC, I'll say, let's throw up a burner on Hollywood + Vine that disses the alphabet bois. Maybe then we'll meet a bunch of bustdowns, ballas + buttafaces!

His response: neck-scratching + some mystified silence. And then I'd say: um.

I mean, there's shit I'm just figuring out that he's known for thirty years + I'm gonna have to try very hard not to try to impress him because you know what? It's just not happening. I can bring delight + intelligence + personal charm + lots of love to a conversation, but with TC Boyle (+ Aimee Bender, for that matter), you're not going to impress these people. That's their job, that's what they do effortlessly + they do it way better than you + they do it because they're not trying to impress you. They're being real, you're not. Ah, stupid defense mechanism. . .

5. TC Boyle used to take a 2-hour bus ride to SC for a whole year (each way) where, he explained, he would ultimately be the victim of racism. I laughed so hard when he told me that. I asked him if he'd ever written about his commute + he said no, not yet

6. According to TCB, if you call yourself a writer + you spend a year not writing + it doesn't bother you, then it's over. You're fucking done man. If you feel bad however, he explains, then that's a good sign

7. He tries to avoid email + the web whenever possible + only uses them for communication + research

8. We both seemed to agree that something has happened to Rick Moody's writing. I love early Moody (Demonology, The Ice Storm, Garden State). I feel ambivalent about his memoir + I just can't get into Purple America. The Diviners I'm willing to give a chance to (maybe more than once) if + when I finally get to it.

--I keep starting Purple America over again, I confessed, but I just couldn't get into it. It has something to do with all that stuttering + the computer voice just gets to me
--Yeah, he said, I've started that book several times now.

Our conversation about Rick Moody, who he's met only a couple of times, led to another one about the role of editors + agents. TCB feels like most editors don't really do shit, they just copy-edit. I dunno. At Hachette Books, I saw some of the editing that went on there + it seemed pretty extensive. Not only did some of the editors write out 4-10 single spaced pages of global suggestions to the author, but there were also several rounds of copy-edit exchanges between editor + author over the course of several months, all of which impressed me greatly. At the same time these observations were based on commercial + genre fiction manuscripts, so it might be very different with literary fiction. Additionally, I happen to know that by the time TCB hands in a manuscripts, he's already edited it so much that it's almost ready for print--a detail he's pointed out more than once. The sick thing: I totally believe it.

Another thing: TC Boyle doesn't like editors that try to rewrite stories for an author. I pretty much agree, though I'm completely open to suggestions like simple cuts + some touching up if it makes the story tighter or cleaner in some way

9. Being a persistent fucker, I asked him months ago if I could bring something in for him to take a look at since the administration screwed up + put his graduate fiction workshop at the same time as our required cultural theory proseminar. He said, --fine, just wait until the middle of the semester. So today I gave him a story. Though this is counterintuitive, I gave him one of my worst stories to critique. "Hipster Nirvana" isn't a bad story, because I have aesthetic pride after all--I'll revise a bad story until it no longer blows, then I'll revise it some more until it's decent, then again until it's good + again until it's very good--even so, it's still one of the worst stories in PORN + LOVE (my short story collection) for the simple reason that I don't know if it really works or not. Most of my stories I know, but this one I'm not so sure. I even admitted it to him that it's a B-side story. TC Boyle being TC Boyle, said he writes every story like it's his best one. I remember thinking, you would think that, punk.

Then, out loud I said:
--Come on Tom, paraphrasing Bakhtin, --the Ancient Greeks didn't know they were ancient.
--Yes, but they knew their grandparents were ancient, he said, chuckling.
--And I didn't know this was a B-side story until I was finished writing it, I said, which is the truth.
He nodded, which was about as much as I was gonna get from him.

Anyway, I know he's gonna critique that story really fucking hard + actually, I think that's exactly what that story needs. I'm planning on giving him one of my better stories next time, just to balance things out + pick his brain. I still have a lot to learn with plot + layering novelistic landscapes + publishing, but I can also tear shit up with some of my stories too. I'd prefer to give him a wide range + have him make up his own conclusions. He's TC Boyle, so we all know that's exactly what he'll do.

As I was gazing at one of the walls in his office covered by a million TC Boyle heads, all dutifully cut out from magazines, journals + book sleeves through the years + pasted in a lifetime achievement montage, I thought:

Fuck, this guy's the real deal. And he's had one bad haircut after another since the 70's

My First Murmurs as a LA Writer

I'm not gonna lie, this was a pretty good week for me as a Chicago implant + new LA fiction writer. Among the many small things that give me little heart joy:

1. I met Howard Junker (the editor of the ever-great ZYZZYVA) on the phone on Wednesday. Evidently, he liked one of my short stories I'd sent him only last week about a pepera that falls in love with one of her victims. It's called [ ]. He told me a bunch of things, many of them mysterious + smart, some even flattering: he wants to publish something of mine in the spring; it may be [ ], it may not be, who knows; he wants something of mine hot off the press; he feels like [ ] is good, but slightly old for my repertoire, but not wrinkled per se. He didn't tell me why he thought that though (I wrote [ ] in the spring of 2008, so in a way he's right, but maybe he's been reading my blog). Anyway, of course I'm thrilled by this because ZYZZYVA is the real deal as far as literary journals go, a fierce defender of emerging writers + Howard Junker has been fighting the good fight for 25 years, even standing up to other journals that have become too smug/slick for their own good--something I welcome frankly because it forces us to ask ourselves why writing matters. At the same time, nothing is set yet for me. So until he says yes Jackson let's do this, I look at his letter/offer as very promising for sure but not concrete. Not yet anyway. I think I'm going to send him a new chapter from my second novel that I recently started. It doesn't get fresher than that man

2. I gave my first public reading in LA last night at the Mountain Bar for USC's The Loudest Voice (along with my talented classmates Elise Suklje-Martin, Lisa Locascio, Jess Piazza + poet extraordinaire Mark Irwin).

Though my performance wasn't my favorite one by any stretch of the imagination (I mean, I actually messed up a few words + adlibbed more than once as I was turning the page), people seemed to like it a lot, which is always flattering

3. Mark Irwin, (who is one badass poet, not to mention a four-time Pushcart Prize-winner) came up to me afterwards + told me he really enjoyed my reading. Mark fucking Irwin, man. This guy's huge + has been published in every major literary journal + not once mind you, but repeatedly. Anyway, when a poet of that caliber, charisma + reputation compliments you, you do one thing: you fucking take it

4. I'm entering BLANK in the Bellwether Prize this Monday, a contest founded by Barbara Kingsolver to spotlight socially conscious fiction that speaks of the greater world around us + our responsibility to that world + to each other. It's gonna be hard to win that contest because there will be many fantastic novels, many of which will come from writers with impressive resumes + even more impressive apprentisage, but I still have to try. BLANK, despite its flaws, is a beautiful + important novel + it advocates human connectivity, social protest + collective responsibility as well as offer a critique of narcissism, doing so in a way that is important, ambitious + yet also tricky too for some agents to swallow. Wish me luck peeps. In this industry, talent is not enough. You also need lucky dice + an empty seat at the High Rollers Table to strike it big

Writing + Consequences

After workshopping "Love Beepers," in Aimee Bender's class, my short story that has become a chapter in my second novel, The Ninjas of My Greater Self, she wrote about the importance of consequences in fiction, how when a character makes a decision to do something, the writer needs to exploit how that decision affects her because this helps bring the character more closely to reality + makes the reader more invested in who she is. The point isn't to just focus on the character's interaction (that may or may not affect her decisions), or even on the series of actions that leads up to the decisions she makes (though often that's important too), but to give that character a certain liability where decisions have consequences, because it's those consequences, the fact that characters--like humans--must bear the repercussions of their decision, that they must live with the things they do, it's that character ontology for lack of a better word, that connects us to characters, makes us feel that they're somehow more real + also grounds the narrative.

You know, I think she might be on to something.

Meeting The Rockstar for the First Time

I met my thesis adviser, TC Boyle, yesterday, and he looked exactly like he does in photographs. I mean, exactly: the post-punk braid in front, the earring and the funky t-shirts. In fact, I even said to him:

--You look exactly like you do in photos.
--So do you, he said, sarcastically. I mean, like this dude's ever seen a picture of me before.

My first conversation was a little less than a half an hour, but I learned a few things:

1. He's working on a collection of short stories right now and trying to promote The Women, so he's gonna be hella busy. But, he agreed to work me later in the semester to talk about my writing, which, in a way, is better than taking with workshop with him

2. He encouraged me to stop by his office and chat again, and offer I will absolutely take him up on

3. This dude is fucking smart. I mean, he really knows his shit

4. We both like the performative aspect of reading our stories, though, truth be told, he's amazing when he reads and I'm simply a novice compared to him. But, I've got my own thing, nevertheless and I'm comfortable and happy hitting the mic

Where I'm different than TC Boyle is that when I read in public, I'm trying to convince people that they should listen to me read whereas his audience already knows that before he says a word. He agreed. And when I told him that having an audience has made me a better writer, he was surprised. I get the impression that he writes for himself and picks the pieces he's going to read out loud based on what he thinks people will get the most out of. When you've got hundreds of stories to pick from, that's probably a little easier. Maybe I should think more about what the audience wants in my reading than what I like to read, but there's a stubborn part of me that hopes that if I'm into it, it will show, and the audience will be into too

Where I tend to think about this more is in terms of what I'm writing: ever since I accepted that I have a readership--no matter how minute but no less devoted--my writing improved because I started to make sure my sentences made sense. When I used to write just for myself, I wrote some terrible shit that could only have been written by someone trying to impress himself, literally proving to myself that I was a writer by acting writerly. But as I got older, once I'd accepted that I was a writer and that on some basic level I always write my own stories for me because I'm the only person that understands what I'm trying to do, but now, as an evolving writer, I also acknowledge the dialectical relationship my writing has with my idealized reader. Ever since then, my writing has gotten better because I've become more objective, which has helped me revise my stories. My artistic side is still crazy and ebullient, and the ideas still flow like meade in Beowulf, but my critical and editorial side is much better than it used to be, and this honed skilled has helped me learn to finish stories. I used to only know how to start the story, but now I'm learning to be a finisher, which is much harder for me. My sentences aren't less lyrical or ambitious, they just make sense on some objective level. I guess it's phenomenological in that way

The other possibility is that I still write for myself, but that my technical standards of what is good writing have gone up as I've read more and more good fiction and creative non-fiction and my revising skills have improved enough because of that. Who knows?

5. TC Boyle's work ethic is sick and it inspires me to commit to my profession in a complete and absolute way. Truthfully, I was always that committed (which is why I was sometimes a social outcast at Notre Dame), but seeing that kind of commitment in one of your favorite writers is still inspiring

6. Spending time with him is going to be difficult, but worth the effort. Fuck, I'll get in line

1st Workshop with Aimee Bender

I'm not sure what I expected (a reformed urban hippie maybe who wears lots of bead necklaces, lives on green food and pauses a lot?), but Aimee Bender in person, is even smarter, more grounded and sweeter than people told me she'd be. She's really fucking cool. There's absolutely nothing meretricious about this woman. She's not glitzy, sententious or self-absorbed. In many ways, she's the exact opposite. I sent her an email to see if we could brain storm about literary agents for a little bit, and she already wrote back and said, cool, let's do it. It's fucking amazing how accessible and kind she is, so early on in the game.

I remember the first thing she wrote on the blackboard, it went something like this: perfect execution is not the point of workshop. I had confessed to her that I kinda hate the game fiction writers play (myself included) where our first short story in workshop ends up becoming our manifesto, our place for creating first impressions. That first manuscript is almost always a declaration of talent instead of a confession of vulnerability. As writers, we hate being vulnerable, in part because we're vulnerable all the time. But there's something manipulative about trying to control what people get to see of you, especially since inevitably they will figure it out anyways. I don't have a problem with someone submitting new--and possibly kick-ass--stories for workshop they've never workshopped before. In a way, that seems to be the point, to workshop pieces you're the most excited about. But I do have a problem with people who submit stories of theirs that have already been workshopped and praised (major revisions notwithstanding), published, stories they submitted to get into the program they're now in, or more rarely, stories they know for a fact are simply radder than rad. I don't see the point of this, and that's why I really appreciated Aimee encouraging us to submit stuff that is raw but ready to be looked at (as opposed to stuff that is raw, but that hasn't been worked out yet). Workshop should be the place that you get helpful, critical suggestions for pieces that need output, not the place where you're constantly covering your ass so that people don't tear you apart. I'm glad Aimee Bender set the tone of workshop, and also glad, I guess, that she appreciated my honesty, because it embarrassed me a little bit. I'm not gonna lie.

I'm glad I'm in her workshop. Now, the question is, what do I have that's raw enough for this workshop.

Maria Massie Rejects BLANK

Dear Mr. Bliss,

Thanks so much for sending along BLANK, which we’ve now had a chance to read. Although we found the concept compelling and ambitious, and were genuinely moved by certain of the novel's passages, I’m afraid that we just didn’t fall in love enough with the execution to offer you representation. Maria is therefore going to step aside so you can go ahead and find an agent who will give you the full enthusiasm you deserve.

Thanks again for giving us the opportunity to have a look and we wish you the best of luck. You clearly have a lot of talent as a writer, and we have no doubt someone else will feel differently about BLANK.

All the best,

Rayhane Sanders

Good Rejection from Story Quarterly

Dear Jackson Bliss:

Thank you for submitting your story [ ]. Though we liked it a good deal here, we think the story may be longer than it need be, and so we need to pass on it with apologies for having held on to the story for so long. We are sure that you will be able to place it elsewhere.

Sincerely,
J.T. Barbarese
Editor, Story Quarterly at Rutgers-Camden
Rutgers University
Department of English
Camden NJ 08102

Maria Massie Asks for Partial of The Amnesia of Junebugs

Dear Mr. Bliss,

Thank you very much for your recent query regarding representation for BLANK. The novel sounds interesting, and Maria would be pleased to have a look at it. Please feel free to send it along at your convenience, preferably via e-mail. If you choose to send a hardcopy, you may direct it to my attention at the address below, marked 'requested materials.' We look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

J. N.

LMM
27 West
New York, NY

Nicole Aragi is a Virtual Conspiracy

There are a lot of incredible literary agents out there, and none of them have a more incredible client list than Nicole Aragi. For those of you that don't know her opus--and it is an opus--let me count the ways this former bookstore owner has changed the literary landscape for the better. Here are her clients:

Rabih Alameddine, Monica Ali, Andrea Ashworth, Dennis Bock, Charles Burns, Pang-Mei Chang, Dan Clowes, Edwidge Danticat, Alain de Botton, Junot Díaz, Nathan Englander, Nuruddin Farah, Jonathan Safran Foer, David Francis, Maureen Gibbon, Paul Griner, Daniel Hecht, Aleksandar Hemon, Mia Kirshner, lê thi diem thúy, Amin Maalouf, David Masiel, Jane McCafferty, Tova Mirvis, Julie Otsuka, Victor Pelevin, Scott Phillips, Michael Rips, Joe Sacco, June Spence, Manil Suri, Hannah Tinti, Brady Udall, Chris Ware and Colson Whitehead.

Yo, wait a second: do you read that? Junot Diaz? Edwidge Danticat? Hannah Tinti? Alexsandar Hermon? Jonathan Safran Foer? Colson Whitehead? Seriously? Nicole Aragi is so good she's virtually a conspiracy.

Anyway, about once every year, I send Nicole Aragi's assistant a query letter, sort of like sending out Christmas cards for the holidays. It's sort of an annual tradition of mine. This time, maybe because my query letter sounded so fucking desperate (but honest, I have to say), Nicole Aragi's assistant was kind enough to write back. Here's what she wrote, a completely legit reply. After doing some research, it turns out that a million aspiring writers have received the same response before. So, I'm not special, but at least Nicole Aragi's assistant was courteous, punctual and honest. I can live with that. For now, anyway. . .

Here's what she wrote:

Dear Jackson,

Thank you for your interest in our agency. Sadly, however, Nicole Aragi has a full client list and is not taking on new work at the moment.

We wish you the best of luck in securing another agent

Yours,

L. S.

And my reply:

Dear L.S.,

Thanks for responding so quickly. I appreciate that.

Okay, no problem. I understand. If and when Nicole does decide to take on new work later on, I hope you'll keep my query letter on file, just in case.

Enjoy June in The City.

Peace, Blessings,

--Jackson

(Another) Good Rejection from Witness

Though I appreciate the good rejection over the impersonal form rejection obviously, I've been noticing a recent phenomenon where I keep getting the same good (but also, very short) rejection from Witness. I'm not trying to sound ungrateful, but it's starting to lose its charm. I mean, if you like my writing so much, why not tell me what's the problem with my submission: is the voice just too "ethnic" for your tastes or is the scope too urban for typical bourgeois literary journals where it's all about broken families, alcoholism + child abuse? Actually, these are all rhetorical questions because I know it comes down to taste before anything else. There's a Least Common Denominator with technique, and then after that, it comes down to style, in other words, editorial taste.

Anyway, here's like the third rejection from Witness I've received that says this. It's not a bad sign of course, but the gloss is starting fade frankly. I'm over the good rejection phase of my life. I only post them here because I like to catalog my submissions + post auspicious responses, in whatever form.

So here it is. Again:

Dear Jackson Bliss:

Thank you for giving us the opportunity to consider your work. Unfortunately, this particular submission is not a good fit for us. We are impressed by your writing, though, and hope you will feel encouraged to submit again.

Sincerely,
The editors

My First Letter to Junot Diaz

Fresh + awake from traveling through W. Europe + Morooco, I decided to write Junot Diaz. Here's the letter I sent him:

Dear Junot,

I know you're a busy man these days after the Pulitzer madness and everything, but I'm writing you because I'm stubborn like that + I'd appreciate your help. I'll work my ass for any kind of help by the way, so I'm not looking for a hand-out or a chippie from you, just whatever you feel is deserved. But here's my deal, and I hope you'll just take it as one emerging fiction writer reaching out to an established one, and nothing more.

I've got my MFA from a pretty good program + I'll be starting my PhD in literature + creative writing at USC in the Fall, so institutionally I'm getting some support, don't get me wrong. But it's the important little things I really need your help with. For one, I have a 460-page novel called BLANK that I think rocks the joint. Like all works of literary fiction, there are holes in it, moments of self-indulgence, hang-ups + other shit. I'm not gonna lie. But in a couple ways, it reminds me a bit of The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao (strong, contradictory, complex characters, multiple narratives, multicultural, moments of lyrcism, all that) and that's why I'm asking you + not just any fiction star for some guidance. But the thing is Junot, this novel is superambitious + despite all of its flaws + virtues, it's using voices (chinese-american, senegalese-american, moroccan-french, indian-american) + exploring subjects (parkour, culture jamming, porn piracy, emotional voids, nymphomania) that agents aren't willing to touch, at least from an unkown fiction writer with a name that sounds like a fake-ass nom de plume. I've received lots of praise for this novel, for the ambition + beauty of BLANK, but it's usually the same shit: Jackson, you need someone who is going to passionately defend your novel, and I'm not that person. . .

I know all of this sounds wack, like I'm whining about not getting a break. But, that's not it man. I've gotten more than 500 rejections (and a few acceptances too) in the past five years from both journals + agents, I've sent partials to almost every agent whose client list shows stylistic similarities to my own, and I've been writing seriously since I was an undergrad (and I'm 35 now). I mean, I'm doing my homework, revising my stories all the time, tweaking my novel + definitely putting in my time for sure. This shit is my life Junot, and I've had so many people tell me, or stop me from writing since I was young, but I have to write. That's why I'm on this earth: to write, to create + affect. At the same time, I feel like at some point, every writer with talent, conviction + a different voice, who can't (or won't) write the typical workshop novel with all of its emotional paralysis, white despair + Freudian histography inevitably needs help from someone with power, especially when he's writing something new, audacious, unapologetic, at least before there's a market or a readership for what he does. . .That's just where I am at right now.

So, maybe if you're feeling compassionate/impatient with me, you've already jumped to the how, and asked yourself how the hell you can help me. Well, in a million ways. I'll just list some things, and if you feel like doing any of them, I'll be eternally grateful. If not, I'll be disappointed because of the person you seem to be to me, but I'll get over my shit eventually + just take it as another bump on the road to my own career. Truthfully, I get it: why would you help me? You don't owe me shit, you don't know me at all + maybe I come off as a whiny, fiction poser who wants people to eat his food for him. But part of me feels like you have a soft spot for the hardworking underdog. Well, here he is Junot. So here's a few things that could help me out. Am I asking too much? Hell yeah. But I've got to try anyway. This is my life man. . .

SOME WAYS YOU CAN HELP (in descending order of time commitment)

1. Maybe this summer, when you had a weekend free, you could read BLANK + tell me if I'm fucked in the head.

2. If you're not up to that (+ I guess I don't blame you since you have no idea whether that would be worth your time), then, maybe you could just read a few chapters + if you felt like there was promise there, tell Nicole Aragi what's up. Trying to contact her directly is like trying to break into a federal maximum security prison with a shoespoon.

3. If you don't like any of those ideas, you could let me send you some short stories for the BR. I've already sent the Boston Review 8 short stories, all of them rejected. And to be honest, I thought the last three stories might be up your alley, but I'm not sure that they even made it to your desk. Almost all of my writing is character-based, but I don't know if your fiction readers like my stuff or not. So far it doesn't seem like it. . .

4. You could kick it with me at a bar for hour in Chicago this summer, or LA in the fall onward + just talk shop with me. It means a lot to me to be able to talk fiction with someone who knows what's up + it would be inspiring. I could learn a lot from you, your life, your dedication. Not only that, but it would make me feel like the big guns in the literary world aren't too big for their fame, and that some day, with the same love, dedication + stubborness, I'll make it too. That might stupid, but that's way important to me.

All right, that's it. This is a long, fucking message, and I'm like half-sorry. But it's all real + honest Junot. I'm just telling you where I'm at + hoping that you some part of this email resonates with you, even for a second. Like I said, you don't owe me shit, but I'd genuinely appreciate your help anyway + I hope you'll do the right thing cuz it matters to me. And I think it matters to you.

Con Amistad + Agradecimiento,

--Jackson Bliss
 
And here's his response:

thank you for your email but im entirely focused on my own work right now and
can barely get to do that given my teaching obligations, my community
obligations, my editing obligations, and my attempt to keep a social life
going.

this is about the 97th email of this kind ive received in just these last two
months. good luck. it is not an easy road.

j 

And my reply:

junot,

it's cool. i know you're crazy busy + I kinda figured you'd say this. but shit, i had to try, even against all odds because there's just too much at stake. i get it though: you can't help everyone. maybe you're not even supposed to.

when i've weighed up to my class, our paths will cross I hope someday. in the meantime, i'll keep fighting.

with respect,

peace, blessings,

-jackson

Short Story Published in Kenyon Review

My short story, "Cowboys of My heart: The Six-DVD Box Set," is finally available to be read online in the Kenyon Review. This experimental story uses a non-linear narrative to explore the theme of love triangles + counterfactuals. Basically, it's a short-story that wants to be a DVD. If you're interested, you can check it out here:

Giving Props for My SC Acceptance

USC's PhD program for literature + creative writing is badass. It's so rad, in fact, that it makes me dizzy. On the fiction side (my side), you've got TC Boyle, Aimee Bender, Percival Everrett + Marianne Wiggins. On the poetry side you've got David St. John, Mark Irwin + Carol Muske-Dukes. USC's PhD program is basically artistic vertigo. But I digress.

After screaming out loud + crying in my girlfriend's neck, the first thing I did was write the people that helped me get into USC. You have to do that, thanking not just the creater/universe/whatever configuration you're into frankly for the privilege of being able to write, read + evolve, but also thanking all the people that helped you achieve that. These are people that pushed your potential art into kinetic art. They used their own energy to nurture and guide your writing.

So, I wrote letters to Valerie Sayers, my thesis adviser and friend from Notre Dame, and thanked her for guidance, widsom + perspective (after all, she helped me decide which writing sample to submit, not to mention she was the person who introduced me for my Sparks Reading, and called to accept me back in the spring of 2005, officially creating space for me in this world to be a writer). Then I wrote William O'Rourke and thanked him for accepting my conceptual story in the NDR, and for his help as an old skool critic. Apropos, he wrote one of the most flattering rec's I've ever read. Then, I wrote Steve Tomasula and thanked him for his mind, for his literary deviance, and above all, for his support, intelligence + enthusiasm. He told me he made we walk on water in his rec., and damn I needed a little Jesus in my application. I also wrote my friend and mentor, Jim Dorsey at Dartmouth College, who was a visiting professor at Yale for one of my classes when I was working on my first M.A. there. He has written no less than 10 rec.'s for me over the course of 10 years for a million different programs (and half-baked aspirations) at a long-list of schools (PhD, MFA), supporting me when I considered going straight academic (Berkeley, Stanford, U Dub), straight fine arts (Notre Dame + Indiana U), and now, a perfect hybrid of the two (SC + FSU).

Finally, I wrote Julianna Baggott, the assistant director at FSU. I know this year didn't have a normal fiscal pulse for Florida State, and I didn't want her to feel bad about not being able to accept me like she may have in a normal year. I know she respects me as a writer and likes me as a person, and had hoped that FSU financial situation would improve. It didn't, they accepted 2 fiction PhD's instead of 5-6, and that's not her fault. Anyway, here is the letter I wrote her:

Hey Julianna,

I'm sorry things didn't work out. Sort of feels like we broke up before we dated or something. . . Even so, I just wanted you to know that I really appreciated your support, honesty + compassion. I know you only had so much control over your budget, and the FL legislature, and that in another year things probably would have ended differently.

Even so, because I know you feel a little guilty about l'affaire FSU, even though it's clearly not your fault, or anyone else's for that matter, I thought it might assuage things a little bit to let you know that things ended up great for me anyway. I got into USC's PhD program for Lit + CW (fiction, obviously) and I'll be working with some cool writers (not to mention, I'll be an hour away from my mamma), so don't worry about me. I'm cool. And more importantly, happy I got to know you a little bit during this whole process.

I'm looking forward to running into you at a conference/residence in the future. Thanks again for the way you handled things and the grace with which you did them, and stay in touch.

Peace, Blessings,

--j1b



And here is her response:

USC is a great program! and personally i'd love to be only an hour from family. thanks so much for the updates. i don't consider us broken up! i'd love to hear what you're doing from time to time, if you don't mind jotting me little notes. i know you're going to have a long and splendid career! it'd be a pleasure to watch it unfold -- even from afar.

all my best,

jb

Accepted in USC's PhD Program in Literature + Creative Writing!

Two minutes ago, I got my acceptance letter today from (U)SC, and the first thing I did was hug my girlfriend and cry. Maybe it's the latent latino in me, maybe it was holding in four months of tension + uncertainty, but my god, I had to let out all that emotion somehow. At the very end, USC came through for me, and so did March. Ahumdulila. Seriously, that's my only response: Ahumdulila. Dear universe, buddhas, god, nature, whatever and wherever you are, thank you. I'd like to give props to the creator for this. I'm humbled and moved. I promise not to waste this enormous privilege.

Good (Generic) Rejection from Columbia

Dear Jackson Bliss:

Thank you for sending us your work.

Unfortunately this particular manuscript was not the right fit for Columbia: A Journal of Literature and Art, but we were very impressed by your writing. We hope that you will feel encouraged by this short note and send us something else.

We look forward to reading more.

Sincerely,

The Editors of Columbia: A Journal of Literature and Art

From Wait List to Rejected List at FSU


Here's the gracious rejection email that Julianna Baggott at FSU sent me, one of the final emails in a series of conversations we had:

 Jackson,

It's a combination. We usually overbook, meaning we usually accept more people than we actually expect to accept. We're trying to hit a target -- if we go over, well, we go over. But this year there was no margin to go over. At all. We could only accept as many as we had spots for. So it was tighter than usual. And then I was told one fewer and other wrenches. We had to wait. And wait. And now more folks -- from that tight offer batch -- have said yes than expected. So that's where we are.

The top seven-ten in both the PhD and MFA file in fiction, I felt like I would be honored to teach any of those students. Honored. The work was really stunning. Yours included. From there, it's a group decision. And it was painful for all of us. The work was really strong -- and varied. And the decision-making was so hard. You are hugely talented. You'll do great things. And I don't say any of this to make this easier.
All my best,
j.

Good Rejection from Kyoto Journal

Dear Mr. Bliss--thank you for sending [ ] in your recent email. Unfortunately, it's not right for Kyoto Journal, but we're sure you'll have luck placing it, and we wish you the best with your writing.

If you're interested in publishing elsewhere in Japan, you might try Yominono, edited by Suzanne Kamata. I think this story might work there.

Once again, thank you for thinking of us.

Sincerely,

Leza Lowitz

FC2 Rejects Defiance of Objects

Dear Jackson,

Thank you for submitting The Defiance of Objects to FC2 for consideration, and for the time and effort you put into composing your manuscript. After much deliberation and careful consideration, I’m very sorry to say that FC2 has decided to pass on it.

FC2’s mission has been and remains to publish books of high quality and exceptional ambition whose style, subject matter, or form push the limits of American publishing. FC2 prides itself on being open to new-to-FC2 and/or previously unpublished authors. However, out of the over 300 submissions we receive annually, we are able to publish only six books per year and therefore must be very selective.

Thank you once again for your interest in Fiction Collective Two.

Best,

Carmen Edington
Managing Editor, FC2
University of Houston-Victoria